differentials

Do I deserve the silence
The equivalent of your space
And what of your undefined hostility
anger or just plain indifference?

I ask calm in return
of my turning my back on you
For it is as much your loss
as my hope that I burn

For it was no choice
just a thoughtful narrative
the merits you could distill
affirm beyond the noise

Do I deserve abandonment
as I lead you out
after I let you in
too close to pain me this moment

What of distance
that I cannot touch you
what of the lines of love and friendship
both gone with the other’s absence

I ask too much
because I give too much
I cry for the calm
as my turbulence wails such.

It was my hero shell
that wished I made you smile
It was my shielded love
that wanted you truly well

Your armor is your pride
My narcissism is my downfall
That in the battle, no hero, no love
could spell happiness to abide.