differentials

Maybe if you keep telling yourself that you are happy it will work.  Maybe if you proclaim it to the world, it just pressures you to be really be happy. Maybe if you see that many people like that you are happy, it should be enough incentive to be happy.

I am a simple girl. Make me happy.

Don’t worry. I won’t steal your heart. I will drill through the toughest part of you and suck away that spring that runs through your heart. Now, would you let me in? [insert consent]

Understanding you means understanding your core. Getting to it is painful. Getting out is painful, too.
But could you numb me and take away the pain?
We could afford some numbness. But you see, pain is pain. We could numb it again and again. You would need to heal to truly take away the pain.
Then why do I have to go through that horrible pain?
Because maybe, just maybe, I can heal you.

Didn’t I tell you it will hurt even before we started?

Hindi ko alam kung ano na tong pinapasok ko. Madugo pala.

You ain’t getting through the core until it’s gritty.

Ang iba ang nilalaman, punong-puno, sobra-sobra ang ibibigay. Ang iba naman ang kalooban puro peklat na, wala ka nang makuha. Ano kaya ikaw?

Wag mo na itago yan. Mas masakit pagtinatago mo.

ang bone marrow biopsy.
malaman.
bow.

Thank you Hema for the BMAs.

How can I tell you I love you
if I can’t trust you
if I can’t fight for you
Cowardly so.

How can I tell you I love you purely
when I wish your happiness
only because it makes me happy
Selfishly so.

How can I tell you I miss you
when I want to run away
when I fear you can’t be faithful
Hurting so.

How can I give myself to you
knowing you are so fragile
and silence, your weapon kills me
Fearing so.

For you,
I dreamed to be brave
I wished to be selfless
I wanted to be strong and whole.

But you,
you just scared me away.

forgive me…
for I have no right to tell you
that I miss you
and I love you
and I will be here for you
even if I’m just dying to do so.